pop tarts are not kleenex
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My vagina just clenched in fear
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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