Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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