Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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