someone get that fucking seahorse.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
