David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i want to swaddle you in tequila
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
