problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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