Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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