I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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