dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
