i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
