If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize