don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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