I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Randomize
