so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
