you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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