I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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