No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
