Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
