Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
