You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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