If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize