their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize