I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
