It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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