it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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