turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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