We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
well you can't waste a boner
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
