I don't think brook has ever known best
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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