hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
