Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
