I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize
