I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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