Just fell off a train. Bad.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
