you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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