beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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