Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
