i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I just had sex on a roof
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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