nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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