Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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