dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
