i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize