Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
he thought i was a dude.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
