I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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