is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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