he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize