i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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