so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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