a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
he thought i was a dude.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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