As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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