This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
